Shaking his head and keeping one hand firmly wedged down the front of his pants, local pervert Danny Turner has today expressed his dismay that the yoga session he attended wasn’t at all like the music video for the Eric Prydz song ‘Call on Me’.
“God, when I saw that video, it was as if I’d opened my third eye for the first time – and no, not the third eye that got me in trouble with the cops last month”.
“I mean I knew it wasn’t going to be EXACTLY like the video – I figured there’d be a few other guys there who’d seen the video as well and were hoping to catch an eyeful as well”.
“But I was certainly expecting a lot more bending and stretching, especially with some extremely suggestive imagery in the background”.
Turner, a 31-year-old unemployed anime enthusiast who still lives with his mother, said he was prepared to take a different class, in case the ‘hotties’ had a session of their own later in the week.
“I just know that once the ladies see how well I can ‘Downward Dog’, they’ll be all over me!”
Turner, a 3 out of 10 on a good day, also had several suggestions on how the yoga studio could improve their branding.
“I mean, why call it ‘Hot Yoga’ when no-one there’s hotter than a 6 out of 10?!”