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Shortland Street to outsource writers room to Facebook community pages

25/5/2018

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In a surprise move, TVNZ have today announced that they have fired the writing staff for long-running soap ‘Shortland Street’, and will outsource the work to local community Facebook groups.


“We understand that this news may shock long-term Shorty fans,” said TVNZ CEO Kevin Kenrick. “But we feel as though we can source much more believable stories and scandal from the various news, gossip and buy, sell and trade Facebook pages in New Zealand.”


“We’ve already got some amazing storylines in the pipeline for the next few months”


“Jack tries to buy ‘sticky buds’ while under house arrest, Chris Warner will try to have the ghost of his great-great-grandmother exorcised from under his bed, and we’re introducing a ‘love-heptagon’, where half the cast sleeps with the other half, and half of the first half get pissed about it.”


Kenrick wouldn’t be drawn on rumours that the majority of the 1 News reporters were facing a similar fate.


“Look, I’m not confirming anything today, but unless I hear Greg Boyed reading out the minutes from the latest community meeting at the Huntly Civic Centre Complex, heads will roll”.
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